Week 2

After recovering from a devastating loss to group of lethargic fat men, Team Epic Fail sought to reclaim its former glory by taking on the Loan Rangers.  Although I am one to appreciate most puns, this was way out of line.  My guess would be that the Loan Rangers are a group of boring bankers well into their 30s.  

Shortly after the game began, a rather old and stocky bank teller collided with one of Epic Fail's star female forwards.  Her name is Jennifer and she has a last name.... I just don't know what it is.  Although the intention of this Loan Ranger is still disputed among most, Jennifer's husband and teammate had no question as to what this reckless player's motives were.  Storming across the turf,  this epic failure shoved the Loan Ranger to the ground... all the while maintaing a perfect side part in his hair.  Needless to say, it ruled hard.

The two goals for Epic Fail were scored by Domino (whose last name I also don't know) and team captain, Jesse Beard.  Upon the second goal being scored.  Epic Fail's Erik Diffin introduced everyone to his new signature celebratory gesture:  the single fist pump followed by the single hand clap... the 'e-diff'.

Due to EF's stout defensive play, the Loan Rangers were shutout and made to look like babbies.  When asked where his inspiration for ruling hard came from, EF defender, Bryan Duggan, simply responded:  I don't know about these guys, but I'm just trying to find a soul mate...

Well said, Duggan.  Well said.

Stay tuned for the results of Team Epic Fail's week 3!!!

Week 1

Week 1, May 15,  saw Team Epic Fail fall in a heartbreaking loss to the Fat, Red-Red Shirted, Round Men.  (No readers, Graham Bennett is not on this team).  In a hotly contested battle of wills, Epic Fail ultimately fell with a final score of 4-3.  Though a loss, many on the team see this as a positive move (largely due to the fact that the team scored, not only once, but three times).  In fact, Epic Fail is not in last place, but rather sits atop position 6 of 8 in the league table.  Team Captain, Jesse Beard had this to say:  "I mean, whatever... Have you seen my pink socks?"

  For Week 2's match Epic Fail will be going head to head with the league's last place team, the Loan Rangers.  I think they may be a bunch of boring investment bankers.

  

Welcome to the Season...